October 12, 2007


My hubby and I just returned from a 2 day retreat. We left the kids with my MIL and we left for some much needed "us time"! We went to a nearby theme park and had so much fun riding the rides and trying the food. We spent one night in a nearby hotel and enjoyed sleeping in and even taking in a movie one night. It was just what we needed to be able to reconnect and remember who we were before becoming Mom and Dad! It was also a nice time to reconnect and self reflect on my position in my home.

As much as I read about Proverbs 31 and about keeping my home with a smile, I must confess, that sometimes I struggle! Sometimes it is easier to be selfish to unleash the frustrated emotions inside that to rely on self-control. I used to rest assured that I was JUST being HONEST! Wasn't it better to be honest that to keep it all bottled up inside. Well, as I have matured I have decided that being 100% honest about every little annoyance is SELFISH! It is not part of creating a happy home to gripe at the kids instead of training them and it is not a part of being a happy wife to gripe and complain at every little annoyance.

I want, as I would assume most wives and mothers do, for my husband and children to really love me and cherish me. I mean to really cherish me. I don't want lip service on Mother's Day or on our anniversary. So for me to do that is to continue to die to self and to continue to develop that servant's heart. What being a wife and mother is boiled down, it is basically becoming a servant to the needs of others. It is so easy in this day and age to want to reject that or to try and reinvent it by expecting the husband to do this or that. Well here is the lowdown. God gave the responsibility of the home to the wife! If our husbands mow the grass then that is gravy for us, but ultimately our responsibility. If our hubbys take out the trash then WOO HOO, we have a sweet and wonderful man; he just lightened our load! The home is our responsibility! I often see wives try and chastize their hubbys (me included) treating them like children, scolding, lecturing, cajolling them into serving us by helping around the house. Look ladies I don't really care what the feminists of America say, it is OUR responsibility to build a loving home!

Well, what do we do to kill that nagging voice? Mine goes something like this:
"How come I am always working! How come he gets to take a break in the chair while I have to dish up supper? Why do I have to worry about what the kids wear to church today and why am I the only one who cares what this house looks like? I mean COME ON can't he see I NEED a little HELP!!!"

So to quench that nagging, UGLY voice I decided to visualize something that he does for me that is wonderful and sweet and charming and wonderful!!!!! My dear husband ALWAYS holds my hand. It doesn't matter if we are walking into church, sitting in the car or walking around a theme park if we are together he is holding my hand. I will try and hold onto that image this week when I start to feel overwhelmed and sorry for myself! I want to develop that servants heart to exault the Lord and to cherish my family!

What is someting you can hold on to the next time you want to gripe or nag or POUT! Find the good point to hold onto. It won't be easy at first but it is so worth it!


Tiffany said...

This was great! This is one area where I have STRUGGLED lately - realizing that I need to become so much more like Christ in my service. Thanks for being honest about your struggles with it too - it seems like so many blogs are just oozing with sweetness and perfection, it's nice to see somebody be real and admit that it is a conscious choice. =)

I saw on Connie's blog that someone gifted you with an apron! I bet it's beautiful - I've admired her aprons for a while now...maybe Christmas...

Dimple Queen said...

Liz, thanks for that post! That was something I REALLY needed to hear! My house is so out of control. The floors are a mess, laundry is piled up everywhere, and dishes are in the sink right now. How have I let it get to this! Just like you said, it all has to do with selfishness and not being that servant that God wants me to be!

I will be praying for your friend.


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